Posts made by saosmash

I've spent some time thinking about this. I know I used to be nervous about apping male characters on new games because of the stigma I expected as a cis, heterosexual woman playing gay or bisexual men. But I eventually got over this because I discovered over time that as long as you demonstrate that you are playing people who are people first, as opposed to sexuality-shaped kinkboxes of whatever dimension, people who are worth RPing with will RP with you, and people who are assholes will be assholes.

I do play a lot of bisexuals. I can be a boring straight white girl in my real life, there's no need to explore that in my RP. I used to play straight boys sometimes, but eh. I've written a few ace characters and received occasional forays into people who don't "get" why you would do that or I guess ... want to "convert" your ace character, which isn't really how anything works, but people do it to real ace folks all the time so I guess it's ... verisimilitude??

On Arx, did run into several people playing (or playing about) nonexistent homophobia, similar to people playing or reacting to nonexistent sexism. Frustrating when people try to sandbox away the parts of the theme that make it interesting and/or enlightened.

Mostly, otherwise, I've lately played on a lot of small games and haven't gotten a lot of shit OOC or IC for sexuality-related things because I'm largely playing in small groups with people I trust not to be assholes. And occasional issues with, I guess, bizarre and idiotic rumors being spread about me and the sexuality of my characters behind people's backs, but it's got the T-shirt on that at this point.

@Ganymede You have my deepest sympathy. This is so hard.

Theoretically, generally speaking, you shouldn't be held responsible for a fraudulent signature executed on your behalf. I suppose if someone acted in reliance on that signature in good faith to their detriment there would be an equitable question about what that would mean in terms of enforcement. One question that may come up is what action, if any, you took upon discovering a fraudulent signature was executed on your behalf.

IDK what enforcement provisions you're worried about 7 years later, tho.

Dipping my toe over at Sometimes a Great Notion. Looking forward to getting my nerd on.

@Ganymede Sadly it's a responsive declaration in a family law case (WHY do I take these). Without my client's signature I don't really have anything to file.

I am missing a filing deadline in approximately 8 minutes because my client has not signed and returned a thing I sent him last week.

I own most of these already, would anyone like gift copies?

@moth omg, wtf. what chain of thought would lead someone to send an email that says that?

The following are a list of times that, as much as I love my cat, I do not need her to purr loudly while grooming my face:

9:30 PM while I am trying to sleep;
1 am;
3:40 am;
Half an hour before my 5:30 am alarm goes off.

Sigh. It is going to be a long day.

@silverfox It's okay to not like and to want to avoid a person. It is definitely okay to give yourself permission to do this. I have also done it, and it made my life better. And I've said this before, but it also probably made better the life of the person I was avoiding. RPing with people you don't like -- for WHATEVER reason -- isn't fun, and is likely to cause stress for you and the person you don't like.

(And if the person paged me and asked what was up, I'd probably just say 'I think it is best we avoid each other.' I don't think there's anything wrong with that, either.)

That said, in these specific circumstances, I'm pretty sure I was at the scene in question and that nobody there was ignoring her poses on purpose. Unless it was a different scene than the one I think it was, in which case idk.

Honestly in a busy public scene I just assume the pose was missed and redirect my energy. The scene will have moved on from whatever it was I did by the time someone scrolls back to find what they missed.

My RL peeve: I WANT TO PLAY VIDEO GAMES but only in theory, I have ten billion games on my steam library and I want to play NONE of them.

It helps reduce the frequency and somehow it has helped me to identify it more when it is happening, somehow, than before I was on meds, and made it easier for me to use self help / self care tools. The first step is being aware but that's not the only step. Also "you're just being crazy right now stop it" is the first reaction from me to myself when I am having an issue like this and that is one of the least helpful things you can do. It's more like "I think this valid reaction I am having is being substantially overblown so let's work on finding something else to focus on" or ... idk there are a number of them but it DOES come down to keeping my shit from becoming other people's problems.

The danger of being reliant on your friends is that you can put yourself into a position where you are asking people for reassurance constantly or even just distributing too much emotional labor to people you care about and creating an imbalance in your friendships that are most important to you. I'd never tell anyone not to talk to friends. But therapists are literally paid to help with emotional labor and also are more qualified than most friends.

As an anxiety patient who takes medication ... it may not work for everyone but sometimes the self help style solutions are simply not enough if your brain is that much of a jerk. Don't underestimate how shitty your own brain can make you feel or punish yourself for having disordered thoughts when there are potential constructive options out there for getting help. Gaming is social and a lot of the ways that socially anxious people interact with it are self-defeating.

@Arkandel My brother's campaign meets every Sunday. The one I ran... met ... consistently until I flaked? IDK. It seems pretty similar just in terms of real life to "DARNIT" ratio.

@Arkandel It does, although there are some books that are available in the free version. I didn't have that issue because I didn't own them, but I started out just using the free version and upgraded when I wanted more stuff. We use it because its CG is DAMN slick, especially for hooking new players who are learning the game, and we enjoy it for tracking spells / HP / inventory. Way cleaner than roll20's system. Plus we keep campaign notes and stuff in there.

Both my current online campaigns use a combination of dndbeyond, roll20 and discord, with the Pancake discord bot for background music.

I hate roll20 as a GM, but it beats... not having roll20. >.>