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    Topics created by silverfox

    • silverfox

      Girl Scout Cookies
      Tastes Less Game'y • • silverfox

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      23quarius

      Minty boys, hands down, I will fight you for some mintyboys. When girl scouts ask me if I want to buy cookies I just translate into my head do I want some mintyboys. There is no other cookie.

    • silverfox

      Did you get diagnosed with...
      Tastes Less Game'y • • silverfox

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      Kestrel

      @faraday said in Did you get diagnosed with...:

      Many doctors, particularly ones of older generations, are not well-versed in adult ADHD. They have stereotypical notions that ADHD is a "kid problem" and people outgrow it. (Some do; most don't.) If your friend wants a proper diagnosis, they'll want to see someone who says "adult ADHD" amongst the symptoms the treat--that's a good sign that they at least are aware that it exists.

      @silverfox used male pronouns to describe their friend, but regardless for anyone else reading who might be going through similar motions, I would like to add that I strongly recommend seeking a female practitioner and/or someone who specialises in "ADHD in women". There's a double whammy stigma not just against ADHD in adults, but specifically female brains as well.

      More on this can be found here:
      Females with ADHD: An expert consensus statement taking a lifespan approach providing guidance for the identification and treatment of attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder in girls and women

      (If you have the patience to read the above study, I would recommend also looking at the references as well, many of which are likewise very insightful.)

      tl;dr for the above link: women are severely underdiagnosed due to referral bias, for example in one experiment it was found that found that teachers were much more likely to refer written profiles of students for an ADHD assessment if male names/pronouns were used even when the profiles were otherwise identical. Women & girls with ADHD do tend to present somewhat differently (more internalised symptoms rather than externalised, which is typical across the board for mental health problems in women). Yet despite underdiagnosis and undertreatment, they do not have better life outcomes in terms of academic/professional success or interpersonal relationships if left undiagnosed/untreated. So this matters. A lot. Even if they're more likely to seem OK, on the surface. Research and common medical knowledge is also generally lacking, for example there's been found to be a lot of interplay between female reproductive health & ADHD, but hardly any psychiatrists know or think to ask about endocrine factors when diagnosing and prescribing. Female puberty, menopause, menstrual cycles, contraceptives and endocrine disorders have all been found to impact dopamine levels and the efficacy of ADHD medication.

      Additional hurdles exist in the UK where the NHS have only just barely begun wrapping their heads around the existence/validity of ADHD at all. I wish I'd kept a screenshot but it was barely a few months ago that their official medical advice website had stuff about ADHD being linked to low IQs and only being diagnosable in children. They updated that only very recently; apparently there was an explosion of people seeking treatment/diagnosis during the pandemic, forcing them to reexamine their current systems & knowledge base.

      For me personally ... I've had to fight tooth & nail for my diagnosis, treatment and medication; it's been a trying journey, but very much worth it in the end. I feel like it's a journey I'm still on, and a lot of people in this community might be able to personally attest to the emotional rollercoaster I've been through this year pursuing it. (Because they were wonderfully supportive and I love them for it.) It's been less than a year since I was diagnosed and it's actually thanks to members of the MU* community that I pursued it at all; a few people in a Discord server I was a member of for a MUD I played were discussing it, shared online tests about it and more than one person seemed to be nudging me with the suspicion I have it. I was pretty resistant to the idea at first but then the more I read about it, the more things started finally clicking into place. I was able to talk to people one-to-one, and even just browsing that ADHD thread here that I'd been ignoring for years helped a lot.

      Like @saosmash, I had to pay out of pocket. A lot. I'd estimate for the first year of assessments, appointments and medications it'd amount to something like £5000 in London. It'd be a lot cheaper on the NHS (like just £100 a year), but getting the NHS to believe you have ADHD and need real medication for it is basically impossible without first coughing up for private treatment. (Doubly hard with the aforementioned bias factors.) Hopefully soon I'll be able to make the switch off of private care, with enough important looking letters from the expensive experts I've seen.

      I've had to argue with my (unfortunately male) psychiatrist a lot, cite studies (which should've been his job to be informed about). I've honestly cried over this, more than once, both with relief (when getting a prescription) and stress (when having to fight for one). I'd switch practitioner but the waiting lines in the UK during this pandemic are borderline insurmountable, and having to start over with someone new would mean having to pay more again and risk losing the prescription I'm on now until my diagnosis is reconfirmed. Having money to throw at people helps, and still only to a point.

      The returns I've seen on this have all been worth it in the end, however; my life is measurably better on medication. My work, relationships, physical health and even academic potential have all improved. (I'm starting a new degree and several new work projects, which I wouldn't have had the confidence to do without this.)

      I've had to do a lot of my own research since I've been able to get relatively little help from medical professionals due to both logistical impediments and institutional bias. A combination of Sci-Hub & NCBI have helped enormously. (God bless Alexandra Elbakyan, hero of our times and personal saviour.) I've spent a fuckton of time just searching stuff about the medication I'm on, my symptoms, etc., poring through the available research. It's been time-consuming but kind of fun, if you're a fucking nerd like me. I couldn't muscle answers out of my psychiatrist so I had to hunt them down. Specific individuals in this community who were available to share their personal experiences with me were a big help as well. (Other women especially, and Americans for whom the whole process is much easier & saner sharing their perspective of much more sensible doctors.)

      I often think about how life might've turned out differently if I'd been diagnosed in childhood but ... water under the bridge now I guess. Just gotta make the most out of what I have and am capable of now in my upcoming 30s.

    • silverfox

      Calling Independent/small shops...
      Tastes Less Game'y • shopsmall • • silverfox

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      J

      My wife makes beautiful handmade wire-wrapped gemstone jewelry: https://www.foxtailandanchor.com

      She also takes custom orders if you're looking for something more specific to your tastes or type of gemstone through her Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/foxtail.and.anchor/

    • silverfox

      Dune
      Readers • • silverfox

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      Derp

      alt text

    • silverfox

      Snow Day - Remote Learning Day
      Tastes Less Game'y • • silverfox

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      No one has replied

    • silverfox

      Holidays - What meant the most?
      Tastes Less Game'y • • silverfox

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      SilentHills

      I love buying gifts for others and this year I NAILED IT. I managed to get my girlfriendwife a lovely chunk on amethyst on a necklace. I fretted about it and wondered if she would like it... and she loved it. She's been very happy with it and that makes me happy.

      I bought Super Smash Bros Ultimate and have been playing it.

      I'm not super close to my family because they're dickheads, so I've been instead enjoying a lazy day hanging out with my online friends, which does somehow seem more special this year because I love them so much. ❤ Happy Holidays you guys!

    • silverfox

      Brandon Sanderson
      Readers • • silverfox

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      silverfox

      The State of Sanderson post came out and again AGAIN Warbreaker, Elantris, and The Rithmatist are on hold.

      So because I love to hurt myself, I reread The Rithmatist today. It ends on such a cliffhanger and my soul hurts.

    • silverfox

      Error happening with quotation marks in Ares
      MU Questions & Requests • • silverfox

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      silverfox

      @faraday said in Error happening with quotation marks in Ares:

      quotecolor

      THANK YOU

      It has been driving me insane and I knew it had to be something I'd done since it wasn't happening to anyone else.

    • silverfox

      Books...Books...Books....
      Readers • • silverfox

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      Arkandel

      This is hilarious.

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Powers_of_Darkness

      TL;DR: Dude 'translates' Dracula into Swedish in 1899. It takes people just about a century to realize he didn't translate it as much as... basically write a whole new fan-fiction version of it with more eroticism, less vampiric stuff, and some kinda social Darwinism commentary.

    • silverfox

      To all game runners/admin/wiz/GM/etc
      Mildly Constructive • • silverfox

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      krmbm

      I don't like to show my soft underbelly to you fucking fuckers, but thank you for this. 🙂

      And thank you to all the players who hang out, play, chat, whatever. Your friends appreciate you!

    • silverfox

      Podcasts
      Tastes Less Game'y • • silverfox

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      mietze

      I've been doing a lot more roadtripping with youngest (8 year old) now that we have two colleges to run things too/help with homesickness this year.

      He's really into Brains On!, which is a science/trivia podcast for kids. Wish I'd found it sooner. Its also pretty fun for the grown ups/young adults in the car too. I would put the beginning age at around 5 depending on the kid.

    • silverfox

      Tastes Less Carrot-y
      Tastes Less Game'y • • silverfox

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      Crawfish

      @Kestrel said in Tastes Less Carrot-y:

      alt text

      Not with that attitude.

    • silverfox

      Well, this sums up why I RP
      Mildly Constructive • • silverfox

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      Ghost

      @Kestrel hahahaha yeaaaaah pretty much what I thought, too

    • silverfox

      What do you call fizzy, non-alcoholic drinks?
      Tastes Less Game'y • • silverfox

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      Thenomain

      @Groth

      It's "soda water" around here.

      Mineral water around here is either "super-expensive tap water" or "water that tastes like rocks".

    • silverfox

      How do you like things GMed?
      Mildly Constructive • • silverfox

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      K

      @Seraphim73 True, though I don't think anyone wants to lose either. The statement applies just as much to GM characters as it does PC's; and while the GM does have a story to tell, they also need to keep in mind that they're dealing with real live players - and they need to plan for the fact that the players won't stick to a script and may, in fact, outsmart or outfight the bad guy du jour.
      More than failure, though, what I (and a number of folks who have talked to me over the years regarding scenes where this was a factor) find more egregious is the sense of wasting our time. This isn't the same as failure or not accomplishing something; but rather a point where you end the scene in no different a position than where you began. Most often this seems to happen when the big foozle is either somehow untouchable despite everything the players try, or has some equally mysterious trap door to escape at the last minute that the players had no way of detecting or stopping; but there are other non-combat related instances that I've seen it come up, too. Failure might irk people in the immediate sense, but getting a feeling that you're inconsequential or that the GM has a story to tell and will tell it regardless of what the players do or where the dice lead usually means people will just stop showing up for scenes. In my experience, most scenes (especially in things like Mage or Werewolf) involve a lot of time and effort beyond the few hours devoted to the scene itself. People do a lot of pre-planning and preparation; be it setting up spells, acquiring/creating items, researching the area or target, or what have you. That can span days, or even weeks, before the scene itself happens - and having all of that lead up to nothing leaves the players with both a sense of failure and that none of it really mattered; which does tend to get frustrating.
      This goes back to what I was saying up there about 'failing forward' (A term I first saw used in WH40k: Wrath and Glory - which is rapidly becoming one of my favorite underdog games and is one of the best RPG representations of the settings I've seen), where everything is focused not on success or failure, but on advancing the plot; and it applies to both the GM and the players. If the players succeed, the GM needs to have a contingency in play that can continue their story without removing the feeling of success that the players might have. Even if they fail in the overall goal, though, the players still do need to get a sense of some kind of accomplishment; and it's up to the GM to work unexpected actions on the players part into the plot without removing the sense that the players can actually affect the world around them.
      As an example, something that happens fairly often in WoD games - a murder plot. Scenario is that there's been a lot of ritual-style killings around town; bodies flayed, arcane or obscene symbols drawn in blood, the whole nine yards. To break it down in WoD terms, the individual sessions would be players investigating these murders, piecing together clues, building a profile. The GM's job here is to dangle enough carrots for them to keep up the investigation, while not letting them have the whole fruit basket in a single session.
      From there the Chapter ends with them finding out who the killer is, where they lair and - if supernatural - what their habits and vulnerabilities might be. They close in, engage and fight the guy. Fight could go one of two ways; the dice are not with them or they didn't take everything in to account and the foozle whomps them. They take some losses but, if they're smart, manage to pull back and extricate. Even by losing, though, they've found out some valuable information on the foozle - more about his capabilities, or that their initial assessment of what he was was wrong, or maybe someone recognized something in their lair that led to a different line of investigating.
      On the other hand, they could win.
      And if they win, yaay. They won. However, when they loot the corpse they discover that the foozle kept a scrapbook, and in that book are newspaper clippings of similar murders going back hundreds of years - and some more recent ones that happened in other locations at exactly the same time that the ones the players had been investigating. Or maybe a few days after the fight, a player catches a news report that the killings are still going on. Maybe the foozle can be in multiple places at once. Maybe he's back from the dead. Or, maybe, he's part of a larger cult; or just a patsy for a greater evil. Maybe that foozle was completely inconsequential and the real killer is still out there. Either way, the players might have succeeded in their stated goal (kill foozle), but ultimately the scene failed in it's objective (stop the murders); while still allowing a way forward to further chapters to find out about and, ultimately, confront whoever/whatever's really in charge.

      Losing the fight still allowed the players to accomplish something; while winning it didn't put an end to the killings, even though the players preparation and dice paid off.

    • silverfox

      Silverfox's Playlist
      A Shout in the Dark • • silverfox

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      silverfox

      Updated - I need to play old women on more games.

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