I'm also in the boat of 'respec with limitations.'
I think you should be allowed a full respec if it's within the first couple months. Especially for little-played characters. Now by full-respec, I'd expect certain things to not change (sphere, major things like clan or auspice or kith...). But it can be hard to fully grok a character or to realize 'I was aiming towards being a ranged fighter, but being a crafting specialist really makes more sense for where I'm feeling this character.'
After that point, I think minor respects are okay within reason. Like @surreality's example. Or someone going through a major life-changing event might adjust someone's Vice/Virtue, or cause a spec to drop...
But the other point to consider is staff workload. I'd only allow things like that once every 4, 6 months. Some people will send requests in to alter shit on a nigh-weekly basis, even when it's not allowed. 'Oh I changed my mind about specializing in X, can I move all of those points?' 'I know I just altered X, but I would really prefer Y'
Everyone is stuck with dots they're not quite keen on. It's just the name of the game.
Min-maxing in a roleplay-focused environment is lame.