Story Number two, in escalating retail dumbfarkery...
Used to work for a local Sears in their hardware department. Now, for those that don't know, Sears had the Craftsman tool line, with the hand tools (non-powered) having a lifetime guarantee. Craftsman hand tool breaks, bring it into a Sears store and exchange it for a new one. That's the way it was for 100 years, seriously.
Anyways, because people always try to game a system, there were 'recyclers', who would go around job sites, find broken tools that has been lost or discarded, bring them in to get replacements under the warranty, then sell the new tools at flea markets.
At first, this wasn't really a huge problem. The company just put it down as a cost of doing business. But, when I started at Sears, we had this local guy that would come in every few months with a pair of 5 gallon buckets filled with broken tools for exchange. Mostly sockets and ratchets. Whoever had to deal with him was stuck for at least an hour, sorting through the tools, sifting out was wasn't under warranty due to rust or obvious abuse, then getting the replacements and ringing the whole exchange up.
Well, about a year or so into my tenure, corporate had decided they'd had their fill of guys like this. So, there was a wording change in the warranty: we no longer had to give a new tool in exchange, but instead gave out refurbished tools. Now, this didn't cause as much outrage among the customer base as you might expect. Because we were now refurbishing ratchets from the 1950's with new mechanical part, which the collectors were very excited about. What it did do is piss off the recyclers. And boy, was our local guy mad when we told him.
Dude threw an absolute fit in the store, yelling and swearing at us. Not acting aggressive enough for security to get involved, but he was really close to the line. So. He dumped his bucket of tools on the counter. Went through them with me one by one, slamming each one down and snearing 'How about this one? Do I get a new tool?'
That was just an hour of pure retail schadenfreude.