@Ganymede
I don't really understand how I'm coming at it from a position of relative privilege. Considering that for most of my MUing life, I've been a non-coder, which is why it never occurred to me that things could be better.
And while my wording might have been harsh, I wasn't talking about any one specific game, since I'm not one to trash a particular game. I'm talking about a general "state of things". While my hyperbole might have been a bit extreme, I legitimately don't think that a lot of coders are in a position to think about something like UX anymore than the non-coder creator of the game generally knows what's going on with the code. This is why in video games and now increasingly even in web design, they specifically hire someone who specializes in UX (This is, of course, not practical in a MU, but I'm emphasizing that it's not easy).
So while I don't expect my thread or even my game to be some kind of grand miracle working savior of the universe, at the very least I want to raise awareness that I and other people see it as an issue. I don't like to think simply in terms of "this is what I want", or "I'll do this specifically for me and my immediate friends". I start discussions because I know that, regardless of my decade+ in the hobby, I'm still relatively new. And being relatively new, I think that it's important for me to occasionally bring up things that I've noticed or that I see as problems.
Does everyone have to agree? No. But regardless, I think that it's helpful. Even if just one person's like "Hey, I never thought about that before", I think that it was worth starting the discussion. I want to contribute to the community, and I admittedly am still trying to improve at how I present myself and my arguments, when to be professional and when to be casual, but I 100% am just trying to help anyone who finds what I say or discuss helpful.
If someone finds my threads or perspective unhelpful, that's fine, not everyone has the same needs. But I don't think that my concerns or perspective are 100% my own either. I have read plenty of things, even things that have nothing to do with this hobby or topic, where someone said something and it changed my perspective, because I never realized something was a problem or that I could do something I'd have never thought to do before.
That said, I don't disagree with the sentiment of doing what's in your power to do, or trying to lead by example. In fact, this thread was inspired by me thinking of how I'm gonna design stuff in my game, and things I've experienced and want to address.
@Auspice
This is definitely an experience I've had, multiple times. Saying something to a coder about something being confusing, particularly in my earlier days, and getting a fairly aggressive or defensive response.