Posts made by surreality

@Auspice That sounds like it is a moment like the kitten era broccoli moment: goddammit why do I not have a video camera built into my brain so I could have recorded that adorableness to share with the known world!!

@Misadventure He could totally do it, which makes that all the more eerie.

In all seriousness, #2 deserves all the cookies that ever were and will ever be. There were a number of teams apparently trying to interfere or stick their nose into my case, which didn't seem weird to me but apparently was (probably in some way I don't understand since I'm not a doctor, but oh well) reason to have something like 6 M.D.s and 2 assistants to those M.D.s and 3-4 residents daily coming in to poke and prod at me (which is not counting the daily IV check chick, or the 2-4x daily blood people, or the nurses, the nurses assistants, the nutritionist, the list just goes on and on and on). All of them had some advice or another -- a fair bit of it useless, and more that was utterly counterproductive.

He had zero qualms yelling at people giving useless or potentially harmful advice on my behalf. In all seriousness, we should all be so lucky, in circumstances in which we can't stick up for ourselves for whatever reason, to have somebody on our side willing to fight for us like that. I am extraordinarily grateful to him for it.

@Auspice Ancient Cat (rest in peace) was like that about... broccoli. But only the broccoli in Chinese food. This never went well. Cat gas is not a joyful thing. But watching a runty puffball get super snarlyface grrr-predator stalking a bowl, only to nudge the meat aside to steal broccoli? That is a memory to be treasured forever.

The current fuzzbutts, well, Tesla (the Disney Princess of Cats) is SO good around people food. She never ever touches it or even gets sniffy. Rica? Steals all the sammiches the moment I leave the chair for so much as a moment. She is very irritated with me that I can't have them again yet. I open a fruit cup or a thing of jello, and there's this mournful wail from the back of the chair almost every time, like her very soul is dying without sammiches to swipe.

@Auspice D'aww!

@Cupcake It really does. It reminds me a little of the first game I played on, a post-apoc MOO called Ghostwheel.

@Ganymede I will definitely look into that.

I am still sorta seething that I spent the major part of the day (literally from 8am EST until about an hour ago) fending off shrieking phone calls about 'that's just what you doooooooo'!

If that's just what I did I would be going under general anesthesia, always a risk, would be spending more days in the hospital with zero notice to that effect, and would have had to front $2k+ (which we don't have) in tests this guy wanted in hopes of being reimbursed by the insurance later, all for surgery that no one bothered to mention on an organ I no longer even have.

I mean, the mind just fucking reels.

In true MSB spirit, though, the folks still would not admit, even after this came to light, that they could possibly be wrong about the whole 'you just do whatever they tell you to do!' thing.

...two more weeks, and I can drink. I'm really gonna need it by then, I can tell.

So.

I saw two surgeons in the hospital. #1 couldn't do the job, really, so they had to call in #2.

#2 is amazeballs. #1... I am stunned this motherfucker has time to do surgery at all with all the time his dumb ass must spend in malpractice court, holy shit.

His first OMG WTF was, the day after surgery, just, you know, fucking off entirely without leaving any notes for anyone for a long weekend incommunicado. Because of this, I was not even permitted a glass of water for three fucking days. (When he got back, 'sure she could have had fluids... why do you ask? Oh, I didn't leave any instructions for anything but the blood tests four times daily, oops!' <murder gleam>)

His second OMG WTF, well, I was on call for a room for surgery with #2. #2's team prepped the room, had me an inch from getting put under... and #1 snakes the room -- the last one that will be made available for the day, that #2's team prepped and was occupying -- for himself and his team, for a non-emergency. (#2 took a while to come see me about this because apparently he was screaming his damned head off about how fucked up this was to someone in charge of... some kind of things, I gather. Have I mentioned that I seriously fucking approve of #2?)

And today, we come to the third OMG WTF. #1 put a stent in a duct and was tracking the infection in an organ. #2 replaced the duct completely and removed the organ in its entirety, all of which was laid out in the notes in language even I could understand. #1's team never stopped bothering the shit out of me at all hours of the day and night throughout my stay in the hospital, they were made well aware of this.

#2 removed the staples a few days ago and cleared me for continued survival without further complications and a few blurry pinhole camera photos of lumpy things that he later removed from my innards. This renders all of #1's contributions -- which were essential early on -- gone, in full.

#1 still wanted me to come in Thursday, and was asking me to get thousands of dollars in tests done beforehand.

My folks insisted 'that's just what you do when the doctor tells you to'.

To which I said: Fuck and no. There is no need for this other than wasting our time and money. I spent the better part of today being screamed at loudly for this by my family until my husband had to tell them to grow the hell up and fuck themselves.

So we call the office to cancel.

Then we found out exactly what it was we were cancelling: surgery to check on the status of an organ I no longer have and to remove stents from a duct that was rebuilt from scratch with the stents removed by #2, who explicitly stated as much in all of the notes and to #1's team of minions.

Holy motherfucking shit, #1. Seriously. How do you not have a fucking cot in the lobby of civil court with this level of unprofessional incompetence?!

They only bothered to look at the notes from surgeon #2 when I called to cancel what they simply referred to as 'an appointment'. Not, you know, surgery that will require at least one or two nights in the hospital.

Holy motherfucking shit, what in the actual hell is wrong with people? <rubs face endlessly>

@Wretched said in Good TV:

I didn't see anyone mention it but... Taboo. UNF.

HOLY SHIT YES. I thought I was the only one watching this. It has been amazing thus far.

@Arkandel Is that back? I saw the first season, but was unsure on the status of anything further.

@Coin It says it's GMC costs. Nothing listed for aspects, though... which would blow if they're 3xp/dot considering that for most of them, not every dot does something, like a discipline or whatnot does. Would make it fairly costly compared to other things. That a dot in a respect is more than a dot of harmony is a bit o.o as well, but I'm betting they are probably sorta feeling that conversion out still somewhat, or at least that'd be my guess.

@GangOfDolls Yeah, sometimes I have to say I'm grateful for the side effects of certain things on me that are addiction risks; not gonna lie, it helps avoid that worry.

While ZOMG ill, I took dilaudid for a couple of days and... no, just no, all the NOPE, NO NAY NEVER NO MORE. After the second surgery, I told them I did not give a damn what they gave me, but it could not be that no matter how much that was 'the most highly recommended painkiller post-surgery', and I would rather take absolutely nothing than ever have that medication in my body again.

Not only is it insanely addictive -- it's synthetic morphine that's apparently some absurd amount of times more potent -- I could feel my intelligence dropping by the moment from a half hour after I took one onward. My critical thinking skills I could track as they dropped in the amount of time it would take me to respond to anything verbally; by an hour after taking a pill that had increased to two minutes of having to process anything I'd been asked (and I mean things as simple as my husband asking 'do you want me to get you anything from the kitchen?'), I had a horrible headache, and felt like I was in a fog. Balance was gone, completely. All I wanted to do was sleep and yell at people (five minutes after they did absolutely nothing wrong) for absolutely no damned reason.

I needed it when I needed it, and it saved me a lot of physical pain and improved a problem that was complicating all the things, but 1-2 every 4 hours? Yeah, that lasted a day before it was 'I'm farming these fuckers out for as long as I can take it and still breathe without tears rolling down my face', because that was preferable to feeling like the above, seriously.

To be fair, it did mean I got to yell really a lot at my father for being a gigantic asshat about 'you might get addicted! That is so much more horrible than not being able to actually breathe! OH GOD SOUND THE ALARM!' after I took a single pill with less restraint than I might usually have employed, but in hindsight, damn, he did kinda earn that one. (Granted, for all I clearly recall of it, I may have called him a giant purple pollution-farting unicorn, but with whatever limited faculties I had at the time, I recall that it was probably mean. It may not have been remotely lucid, but it was probably mean.)

Much for a game with CB and Immortal. Always have been my favorite spheres, hands down.

@Misadventure said in Mental Health and Grown Up Stuff:

Side effects. Some could cost you more than discomfort.

This.

I have 'as needed' Xanax. When I need it, I fucking need it. It is a great help in times of over the top intense anxiety.

I would not touch it with a bargepole outside of those moments, because the side effect I get is... well, it's brutal. (And for the folks with anxiety considering something, putting this here as a generic 'be aware this could happen', but bear in mind this happens and I still say it's worth it when the need is there.)

I get nightmares.

I get fucked up nightmares.

I get holy shit all the angst I was spared while I wasn't hyperventilating into a bag or running around like the sky was actually falling got stored up to come and get me in my fucking sleep nightmares.

We are talking the meanest motherfucking nightmares to ever be mean, with every possible low blow to the ego, self-esteem, etc. that could possibly be mustered.

We are not talking about 'you show up to school naked and forgot your class presentation', it's more 'you show up to a critical business opportunity that if you don't magically make it work you will go bankrupt, the people helping you -- namely your husband and your mother -- are occupied because your husband is off in the broom closet fucking that friend of yours who stole all of your boyfriends in high school after finishing up with your current bestie, your current bestie chases off the customers yelling at you for not warning him that she was like that while your mother clucks and shakes her head and says it's all because you're a fat girl and you should beg to get him back when she's done with him but you're still going to hell because her church buddies said so, and by the way, the building is now on fire and the door is blocked.'

...

...

...

My brain is spectacularly mean to me the moment I fall asleep after having taken a Xanax that day. I would wish that side effect on no one -- but I do want to let folks know what I mean when I say, 'yeah, uh, see how you do on the nightmares with it, they're not a joke'.

@Ominous The concept I have in mind has precisely zero to do with sex, which is probably why I never got her on grid on KD, but oh, well.

I seriously miss my courtesan character from ye olden days of forever ago. If I can get out of my funk, I may give that a shot some time in the coming months. I had a concept for one I really adored on KD, but I never got her on grid. May have to look at if that's wiggle-able into something feasible if the swearing off all the things gives way a bit.

I am still petitioning for an addition of a prequel 'What in the actual fuck just... WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!' stage, personally.

Because I waffle between there and grief kinda a lot.

@Ganymede They're good at keeping the temperature in the safer levels to avoid the leeching problem, actually... granted, that involves people actually reading and following those directions, which is where it becomes a crapshoot. Some plastics are better and worse about this; I'd hope they're using one of the less awful ones.

What's killing me at the moment is that I could have potentially replaced my old beloved Bliss with a refurb, since there was finally one available... but I had to reorder supplies instead. I have some serious sadface over this.

Seconding the advice re: foam topper and massage therapist.

(But then, I have a bed that'd make the Princess and the Pea go, 'Bitch, you have a problem,' and I married a massage therapist, so take my advice with a bucket of salt.)

@TNP The little filter things are several hundred for $5 (so much cheaper than the standard filters for most stuff -- I usually just get a gold filter and say screw it, admittedly, and wish this had one available), and I'm pretty sure it would be easy to tuck a cut normal piece of filter in there, too, for what it's worth.

...now I'm wondering if there's a way to make a gold filter for this thing. Hrm.

@Bobotron Mine last night was about Ancient Cat (who passed more than a year ago now) dying over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and... yeah. I send absolutely all the hugs on the solidarity.

@Bobotron I don't feel right upvoting that even as a sign of empathy/agreement, but will say: ugh, lots of empathy and agreement.