RL Anger
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You miserable longeared slack assed motherfucker with a cunt for a mouth, if only you could suck my ass while licking my balls then you would be considered to be half fucking human, but then again you are only the biggest cock sucker in the world with shit for brains and your fat ass is so open from being corned holed that you cannot even see your nose that is so far up the bosses ass that you need to be ejected before he takes a shit you lying no good cheating bastard with shit for brains take a long flying fuck off your ugly bitches pockmarked face while you suck eggs through a straw.
Naturally replacing any sex-specific terms to those that suit your configuration.
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Just report them. They can only call between only certain hours. There is a HUGE and I mean HUGE fine for that stuff.
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When a client reiterates over and over how urgent a job is and how it MUST be done by a certain date for a meeting the next day. So you work your ass off to do it in time for them, submit it to them a day early for review and final changes before launch. And then they're like, I'm too busy to review and check over it, I'll do it sometime next week and it turns out the deadline was made up.
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Keep billing time to them until next week.
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Not being able to find a backup site for an event. It's so freaking annoying. And hotels who are like 'Oh, this is $500 for four hours' and I'm like 'WTFOMGBBQ?!?!?!11111one'. Of course, you're an out of the way hotel that doesn't GET a lot of rentals (you even admitted that yourself). AUGH.
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When your job requires you to transcribe a conversation, verbatim, and one jackass decides this is a great time to hold a conversation on a bluetooth, while driving with the windows open, while eating potato chips, slurping a soda, and using the most Ebonics-laden Atlanta accent I've heard in years. Fuck you, anonymous asshole guy. FUCK. YOU. The person you are talking to is deaf or hard of hearing, motherfucker. Stop making my job as hard as fucking possible!!!
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When you talk in a video game, and get assaulted with a slur of inappropriate 12-year-old-boy trying to be clever about suggesting sexual shit. (Because you are female, obviously. That guy was lucky we were in comp and I didn't sacrifice my rank to not heal him.)
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Worrying about everything for your move being packed in time. --- Done.
Realizing you have about two days and you are all packed, so what's next? SEVERE ANXIETY
It's where you question you are doing the right thing, you question everything, what if it's a huge fail, what if ....
One day I would like my brain to be as calm and laid back as I project IRL. Just once.
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Apparently it's okay now to fetishize Judaism.
I mean, sure - you want to get together on Friday night, enjoy some challah, sip a little wine? Be my guest. But performing the blessings and comparing the whole shebang to yoga? Fuck you. No, really. My faith is not for your commercialization.
"If you stand for nothing Burr, what will you fall for?"
-- Hamilton: An American Musical -
I was on board with the idea of getting together with friends/family Friday nights to share dinner, foster positive relationships, etc. That's not a bad thing anywhere and saying it's inspired by Sabbath isn't bad either.
... but the rest of it, yeah. Especially, I mean, turning it into a tourism thing of going to places like Mexico just to have a massive crowd eat and, yeah, fetishize religious rituals? What the ever living fuck.
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I'm pretty familiar with the whole 'Jewish-adjacent' concept, as I have the ancestry but not the religion (on my dad's side, naturally), and live in New York, so I've always been around the culture and faith without being in either. But here, it's just pretty much normal. If you're throwing a party, you make sure you have kosher options as much as vegetarian. My mom regularly goes to Shabbat dinners with a long time coworker's family. Etc etc.
But making it trendy is weird and creepy. I can get behind creating resources for interfaith couples (the article makes a good point that the alternative is usually pushing people out, because 'ancient tradition' loses most of the time if you make people choose), and in the end, someone is going to make a buck on it. But the Jewish Grandma on Food labels thing is pretty bad. As is generally the case, I'm all for cultural interchange and set a pretty high bar for calling things 'appropriation', but uh... some of this definitely vaults over said bar, regardless.
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It's good to know that I am, once again, at least fifteen years ahead of the curve on all these trends.
I wore camel-colored hiking boots in junior high, years before Timberland.
I had an undercut in the mid-90s, well before it ever became high fashion
I am a non-Jewish person who has done seders and shabbat for the past eighteen years.
WHATEVER IS MY SECRET?!
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If they're so interested in Jewish custom, rituals, and lifestyle, they can actually hit up a Rabbi and figure out the process to becoming an actual Jew.
Turning these things into fetishes is so weird to me.
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I had an undercut in the mid-90s,
Did undercuts ever go out of style? Or is it something about me still living in the 90s?
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@SG Undercutting our civil rights is totally still in style.
Delete the Hog Pit. It'll be fun.
I really don't understand He-Man -
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@hedgehog This reminds me of a thing that never fails to press my 'I hate people, but that shit's funny' button.
Freshman in high school, make some of my own clothes and such (or mod things/etc.). Bear in mind, I graduated in 1991; the 80s had some of this, but not tons of it in the suburbs outside punk or new wave circles. More or less anything you didn't buy at The Limited or Express was, according to the people who thought they knew anything, was made of pure crap.
It was a big deal when my mother and I would go to this big fancy fabric store that was a couple hours away; it was one of those once-per-year-pilgrimage special occasions. That year, I pick up two colors of this pretty sheer fabric and made a long skirt out of it, layered one color on top, the other peeking out at the bottom.
Cue endless torment the moment I wore that to school.
Fast forward two years. I'm dragged along to that very The Limited that is my bane by a friend, and see a flash of something familiar. So help me god, it was that same skirt. Same fabric exactly. Same colors exactly. Same layer order exactly. Same cut and length exactly.
I spent the next six months cheerfully chirping, "Nice skirt!" at the people who spent $90 late-1980s dollars on the same skirt I made in less than an hour for $12 or so, and had been saying the same thing in a nasty-ass tone to me for the past two years.
Chirpy instant karma cuntbaggery is the best cuntbaggery.
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And, hiliariously enough, if those provincial snobs actually knew fucking anything at all about fashion at that point, they'd know that all of the cleverest, most interesting designers were all thrift shopping/vintage shopping up a storm, save for the shoes.
Granted, I knew nothing about fashion other than what I felt comfortable in. Remains as such.
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Motherfucking April Fool's Day.
WHY!?
Why do we set aside a day each year for the incompetent to play unfunny "jokes" on people? I mean c'mon you fucking lightweights. I'm unfunny 365 days a year. I don't need a day set aside for my idiocy! Follow my fucking lead you assholes.
