Best posts made by mietze

BTW, don't use Negro/Negroid in your description/skin tone label either. It was one of the final straws for me on another game, even though he was made to remove it, and frankly I will never look at that player the same way again. And no, it was not a historical era game. Maybe I'm just noticing it more but I see more and more boundary pushing stuff like that now than in the past. It really makes me feel sad, and mad.

I am really glad to see people not accepting the nonsense but I guess we will always have folks who want to see how teeheeUnPC they're allowed to be.

So sorry to hear this. If his family needs any kind of assistance or has a GFM (I'm not sure if this was a surprise or not), can you post it here?

Nathalie@RfK was probably my pc with the most rich and intricate backstory that also was perfect for including many many other tie ins to other PCs. She had historical or blood ties to many folks on game that were old enough, it didn’t necessarily even make them friends or allies but it was just really fantastic to be able to have a good excuse (not always an easy thing on a vamp game) to inquire and learn more about what that pc had been up to in more recent years, to be a calm listener, to be able to soothe the savage Beast both in how I was able to play her but also genuinely with stats that had both a good chance of success but a really good chance of extreme risk..and having wonderful collaborative players who were willing to play out either or. Also I met Cary on her, so...you know. Super bonus.
It was also super fun to see who drastically underestimated her, who “got it” and was able to subtly weave that in without treating a servant pc as their bestie without reason, who used what she was to manipulate her. There were so many really wonderful rp interactions there, both ones I got to be involved with and those I got to observe.

I also loved Gloria, my dreamy fluffheaded Alucinor on CoFaB. Both her partnership with her pirate captain as his soothsayer of sorts and others. Like RFK I think the single sphere focus was wonderful for a deep dive into vampire theme that’s hard to do with the more mixed up places.

For super fun one-offs, I loved Toni @ BITN. I don’t think I really got to delve much into her background that I was super stoked about—but that’s because I was having so much fun being able to show up with a legit excuse to be anywhere! And be a grumpy smart mouth. Tow truck drivers ftw but I regret never getting to use her driving fighting style to run anyone over.

Kostas@BSO 1.0 was neat. Super battle scarred guerrila fighter who trained child soldiers and then was put in an ensign suit on a real ship again and dealing with...officers. She was fun, and had a pre-arranged expiration date (to keep up the realistic feel that you go through platoon officers like tissue paper in a war situation. It was a death sentence, she knew it, still mother henned her folks. You know, like someone who was used to training children to go be cannon fodder to hold off species destruction for one more day.

The PC that I still have the most attachment to was Ariadne. It was a pleasure to get to play her for like..3 years-ish? Maybe more! She went in a very very different direction than I though she would. But she was fun to play and I think a lot of folks had great fun with her. The circumstances of her loss led an extremely bad taste in my mouth due to ooc nastiness but it was also good instruction for me to know that life really does go on and your stress level rebounds when you make the choice to walk away from a bad situation even after you’ve invested so very much.

And of course, Arianwyn@A2A. Also a super fun pc to play who went very differently that I expected, but it was on that game that I met and got to know many people who I’m still rl friends with even if they don’t even play anymore.

Why is making a generic entrance pose to a public room expecting that everyone will drop everything to entertain you, rather than to gauge what the other people are doing and if anyone seems to be open to interaction? Hell even when people have oocly agreed to meet there's often a neutral pose first if they don't know each other ICly if it's just a bump into scene?

Are you sure you want to report strange or creepy behavior, you don't want to ruin a good man's life when you dont really know if he meant it like that.

Yeah I’m going to be annoying and say all of that honestly really depends.

Usually capitalization and punctuation and basic spelling are important to me in a regular play partner, but I have met people whom I love to death and they bend that stuff regularly. And I won’t not play with someone who doesn’t.

Pose order also greatly depends on who/how many. I’m a fan of 3-per (or 2-per in a 3 person scene), unless it needs to be structured (like a q&a or informational setting). It’s hard for me to focus in large strict pose order scenes esp with very very slow folks and also in rapid fire chaos...but if I have to pick I’d rather the more flexible moving the scene forward. I’m a slow poser (even with preloading) but I’d rather be the one accommodating and truncating or fixing my poses to fit in the rhythm of the scene than making people lose their steam waiting for me.

My only big pet peeves are passive aggressive meta posing and out of synch tense. One turns me off from wanting to play with the player, the other is super distracting.

I have patience for a mix of styles, lengths, speed, etc. with the right folks it just falls into rhythm and it’s so lovely. If it’s not, then at least I tried things out.

This is for non-plot rp. For plot scenes, my patience level narrows—I expect people to be timely (esp if an exception to group # has been made for them) and considerate to other players, and I expect them to have read other people’s and the ST’s poses. In a large social scene that’s a bonus because it can be overwhelming. But if you’re taking up ST time and attention when it could have gone elsewhere, be attentive and considerate yourself please.

@faraday I think the impact of a scene dominating player (antagonist or protagonist) can have a huge impact on a small game, or if they're in a high position. I have seen OOC mememememememe people (of both stripes) kill games (especially small games) when they also have the time to sign up/be everywhere or in positions where one must loop them into everything. Thank god that is rare. But it can and does happen. I do think it's much more noticeable and snowballs really quickly on low pop games, because then people have to escalate to carve some space for themselves too, and I have never seen that not bleed into IC/OOC crossover snark.

ETA: Anyway, this is probably its own spinoff thread. I don't play on this game, though I was considering it once I am feeling better healthwise due to a good friend who's having a lot of fun there (though if I did I would be going for a grounder, for many reasons). Some of the experiences of others does make me a little leery though (I had not heard about this prior to this thread, but I've learned to not really dismiss things like that out of hand either), because I'm of the "Variety is the spice of life" sort, and I don't want to have to deal with personal nastiness directed at my PC in every scene right from the start (nor am I particularly interested in looooooooooove loooove slobber slobber all the time either to be honest with you). I love me some frenemies and friction, but I prefer it to have some purpose or buildup (either bg or otherwise) first, so that it's a scaffolding/development, not impersonal because I happen to be in the same room sort of thing.

• I love Korean jjimjilbang and Russian banyas. While I detest hot weather and whine if the weather involves temperatures above 80 degrees, I will happily roast myself in a sauna while wearing a wool cap (it allows you to stay in longer at hotter temps, because it protects your hair from getting super hot), then jump in over my head to the icy cold pool, then work my way through all the various temperature baths before baking myself in the sauna, and repeating that cycle for a few hours. Heavenly, and makes your skin look great.

• I developed radar nose with my first pregnancy and it's never gone away. This is a bad thing when you have a bunch of young adolescent boys but eventually that part gets easier. So I can smell/identify smells even at very small volume with a high degree of accuracy. It's a cool trick at wine tasting parties because I hate the taste of wine but if you give me what I'm supposed to be smelling for I can do better most of the time than the people who actually taste it.

• I don't like alcohol, unless it doesn't taste like it. I didn't take a drink until I was 21, took one sip of a strawberry daquiri and then promptly gave it to a friend so I could order a non-alcoholic one. I get headaches from tannins and most liquor makes me flush. I love making cocktails though, and can usually enjoy a glass of mead, cider, or a very watered down cocktail.

• I don't get high from marijuana. I sort of smoked my first joint at 40. I've tried edibles, drinkables, tinctures, blah blah blah, so I can track the potency. One time I ingested about triple the recommended dose and all that happened is that I went to sleep like 2 hours later. I'm a little disappointed to be honest. Suggestions, anyone? On the plus side I never feel paranoid or sick either which is good from what I understand.

• I love animals! I double majored in college in Family and Child Development and Animal Science and once thought I'd be a large animal vet. I grew up riding horses (just riding, nothing fancy like showing or rodeo). I've spent many hours on barn watch for calves and lambs and pigs. I've actually rounded up cattle on horseback! Cattle are my favorite. If I didn't know that my husband would kill me, I would get a couple of small breed cattle just for pets. I fucking hate sheep except for lambs. I also think turkeys are freaks. I have been bitten and/or kicked by just about every kind of animal except for exotic cats and large reptiles. I've received the rabies vaccine series like 3 times.

• Aside from MUSHing, my only other long time hobby is survivalism/disaster prep. I used to help moderate a huge forum for non-white-supremacist/fundamentalist religious preppers. At all times we have at least a 3 month supply of food (we have a well which can be used without power though it's a pain in the ass, so we have a smaller quantity of water on hand too), seeds to grow greens and other things in a pinch, sanitation supplies, pretty much everything but a generator. I also have bug out bags for every single person prepped for our family, as well as a car kit in each care for the winter. (during the summer since I have a preschooler i have enough snacks plus half-eaten snacks in the cars to feed half an army).

A lot of people play cross genre. A lot. And a lot of the famous drama and gross people HAVE played on BSG/WoD/L&L you name it.

But. Staff philosophy and tight shipness and tight theme and game culture can make a huge difference in how people get along. When RfK was in its heyday, I saw people who were notoriously horrific to others OOC actually be able to play with others well. I really don't want to know the hours that the headwiz personally sunk into making that a possibility, but it was. A lot of these people won't not play on a game just because it's low powered/open sheet/ect. But they will act better if they know they'll be kicked off if they don't, or if people can safely ignore them.

There is no difference between <any genre> players. The crossover is too great. The people who only play one genre and never any others are the outliers.

So again, it is often the culture, not the content of the games. And unfortunately, with a few exceptions the WoD Game CULTURE has been garbage and/or extremely tolerant and even celebratory of abusive behavior. When taken out of that environment and given firm boundaries, many of the people who act like stupid assholes on any number of loosey goosey WoD games behave like normal people on another.

@Ganymede said:

Even so, you probably won't. The message to me -- intentional or not -- is that the game's staff don't trust the players to play their characters, stereotype or otherwise, well. They've prejudged them, which, although reasonable, runs contrary to the idea of being inclusive or combating prejudices (presuming that this is part of the reason the game is not letting the stereotypes on in the first place).

Exactly. Sometimes to ban 'stereotypes' also kind of exotifies the very people you're nobly trying to "protect."

So. Do you ban smart asians? Hot asian women who are petite? In the kinfolk backgrounds you accept, will you deny any that include the following: rape, abuse, breeding exploitation, forced "marriage", ect (all very canon stereotypes for that class)? If you can't have a street person who happens to be black and a Bone Gnawer, do you also ban the trailer trash white folks--I have seen far more of THAT than black PCs of any type on a MUSH and I've been playing MU*s for 20+ years now? (I'm biracial, but was adopted into a family with strong West Virginia roots, so. Sometimes what people portray makes me giggle, sometimes not. One half of my family is very much coal mining stock stuck in generational Appalachian poverty and illness. )

I would also say, quite bluntly, that the dangerous alpha male who may lose his temper in an uncontrolled violent rage but has been gifted with it in part for a higher and in some cases spiritual cause while still being compelling and good in the sack is a very, very harmful 'stereotype'.

There is a lot of ugliness in Werewolf (at least the oWoD version, I'm less familiar with the new). So what? It can be compelling storytelling. Do a lot of people fuck it up? Yeah. But they'll fuck up the hippies too. You're just not really going to weed out stupid or problem people via background and what you force people to play (or not).

I really really like my new company and coworkers! The learning curve is---well, a lot. But it's ok, I can do this. First time in my life to have full benefits and corporate matching! So I feel cool now

And not to get too deep here, but I can say as someone whose family is deep in the trenches of taking actions and making plans I never in my wildest dreams I'd ever have to take/make in my own fucking country to keep one if my children safe, I personally feel very uncomfortable with people cheapening the evil being done by people to people by dehumanizing the people doing the evil. Oh, that couldn't be people like us, only monsters do that.

I would find a story about the monsters becoming concerned about the true depths of evil rooted in man and trying to protect some folks from it while not exposing themselves for genocidal destruction alongside those beset human groups far more compelling, and less tiresome to me personally.

But that is just a reflection of where I player am at, and of course there are going to be others who will only feel comfortable playing a WWII theme where Nazis are monsters or supernaturally forced from their basic humanity.

I love the tension of characters not knowing. I will be honest though, I have experienced more and richer storytelling both officially and inter personally about the juggling/balacing of keeping secrets and conflicts of living a life while having to hide what you are in the ABSENCE of an ooc mask. Superior and more enjoyable storytelling. In the ooc masque it did not encourage risk taking storytelling and challenge at all, quite the opposite, with discovery stuff being focused on the ooc.

That being said, I dont think there is anything inherently wrong with ooc masque. It just has not been my experience that it serves the purpose people want from it.

Totally on his own with no prompting, my 5 year old has been hard at work with scissors, tape, crayons, and glue stick and has been spending all morning making a board game. It is called "Escape from the Bathroom." Sadly the title has nothing to do with the title (maybe in should be grateful). He convinced the parental units and his teenage sibs to play, it's actually not half bad!

It might depend on what kind of game you're running. Honestly, I would hope that a staffer run of the flu for one week would not crash a game; that sounds like it's populated by some seriously needy and demanding players. Now if that happens on a regular basis, that's different.

I do think that players have to think about longevity also. In the sense of "I like this place, I like these staff people, they seem to be doing a good job. Maybe I won't suck this place dry immediately by having the expectation that I never ever should have to wait a week on anything, and that there won't ever be slow periods or RL happenings."

@Derp I am neutral on them, except for I think it is easier for staff to monitor channels vs the room (especially for a small staff).

A bunch of ooc chatter that I can't avoid where people need to talk about how specifically they banged their wife last night, political screeds, and/or a bunch of game stat wangwaving will turn me off to any games that I log onto as a guest or a newbie. Doesn't matter if that's ooc in a room or on a pub channel.

Update, apparently after securing parental permission (and giving mine as well since I got the AP testing day wrong) I am giving a ride to 7 teens from the GSA club at the high school over to the school board meeting, even though we will need to take off one period early so they have a chance to get there in time to make the speaking list. Also cool are the many offers they've received from adults that will be glad to sign up and then yield their time to them I'd necessary and we dont get there right when the doors open. So yay, I just get to hand out support stickers and keep my mouth shut.

I do not believe /anyone/ has said that they are easy to sort out. In my case though, I could have if I asked for it at least 3 msb people who can corroborate everything I say happened to me as /eyewitnesses to it/. But it's just about someone being an admin on a message board--is that worth making people think about all that bad experience, and for what end? It's just being an admin on a message board. The last day and a half has been fucking hard enough dealing with crap dredged up again. Ultimately I expect the usual thing to happen. Nothing. But I'm getting pretty fucking tired of the implications that people don't know how complicated this is, or that people just want to air dirty laundry to sandbag someone, or that it's all just because people just didn't like each other. And that is all I am going to say about it. Except for yet again, NO it was NOT worth talking about what happened to me because it doesn't fucking matter.

Not being hospitalized for one of the scariest asthma incidents I have had in like 20 years. Amazing what a difference getting a nebulizer and getting inhalers that arent fucking expired makes. I responded well enough I was able to avoid admission, but that was fucking scary and I now have at least an inkling of greater understanding for what some people go through all the time, esp. with their kids.

Also, kaiju (my youngest) SHOWED ME HE HAS A LOOSE TOOTH!!!! So not ready, though he is excited. It seems like only yesterday I was processing jobs and respecs on TR with him on the nursing pillow! (The human grub stage has always been fantastic for me as far as mush availability, then I just have to take time off once that wears off through toddlerdom!)

I have forgiven and been forgiven many many many times.

Especially when behavior only or primarily revolves around game stuff.

When it crosses lines into the individual/personal (such as stalking behavior, doxing behavior, ect) and when it shows a major character flaw (repeated incidences of cheating across many games, repeated incidences of attempting to stir up people against a latest target, or repeated incidences of unwelcome attention/pursuit of people with an unwillingness to hear or pay attention to the word no), then forgiveness becomes a moot point, because regardless of whether I hold affection for that person or if I did at one time, there is just not going to be trust there.

I also dont believe mush people to be uniquely strong grudge holders either. Maybe its just because I have a long history of being extremely involved in community and/or interest group volunteering, but as I have said many times, the worst drama on a mush that I've ever seen does not hold a candle to some of the middle tier drama I saw in the PTA and political orgs, Including territorialism, whisper campaigns, being spiteful to someone's face/behind their back, and even stealing money from people! There are plenty of people with unhealthy behavior problems and obsessions/attachments that glom onto volunteer groups as well. I'd say about the same percentage as mushing really, except for the impact can be a lot worse, because it is face to face, and if you think avoidance of dealing with problematic behavior on a /mush/ is bad...

Like seriously, the year before last year, when a long time much beloved political organizer locally raped a just turned 18 year old /at the state party gathering/, and was promptly removed from all posts/banned from our org, you still had many people loudly complaining about "but he does so much for the party, we cant lose that kind of talent". Sound familiar?

People are people everywhere. Mush people I think tend to be much more on the social/wanting to connect side of things than normal. It is an asset. But does it lead sometimes to hissing and spitting, yes.