Posts made by Catsmeow

@Thenomain said in Lords and Ladies Game:

@VulgarKitten

I would RP with you there but I've been tacitly banned from Arx, sssssssoooooooo...

Me too! --- But to back up the kitten of vulgarity, I have never RPed with you either.

@WTFE

I got a semi-colon butterfly -- emphasis on the semi-colon.

@icanbeyourmuse

I'm not a doctor and I don't play one on tv, but maybe it's a bit of social anxiety? I understand the need to not feel like you are an obligation. It's a mindset reset. If you are in public place and people enter the room after you are there - then they came to RP with you. They are choosing you. Remember that. However, people also need a bit to engage them to RP off of you too. I know it can be hard to engage 'strangers' that you haven't RPed with, but use an NPC wait staff if in that sort of establishment? I'm not watching the RP, so I'm not sure the issue.

I know that when I played Arx, people were always down for a scene. Of course, it helped that I would message and ask them for tea. I had a goal to meet every character on game. You laugh. I came close. Staff was great about saying that yeah I could know new people were around (mainly because my char at the time was social like that). So if you are struggling for something to engage in, maybe you could come up with a social theory IC and have to poll people about it? They have the chance to say "Nah, but thanks bro." -- which you don't have to take personally. Some people like to RP in their groups too. It also sets up something for you to be able to approach (like those mall people) and be like, "Might I have a moment of your time?" It could create a beautiful IC friendship or rivalry that will get you RP and expand your RP circle. This is just a suggestion though.

So I'm doing WAY better now. This is good. I'm employed (if even part-time), I'm on track with my eating, I'm walking like 3+ miles a day and today --- I finally felt like me again. I woke up and did some things and really I felt like the happy person that I normally am. It occurs that this has been going on for a week or two. So it's like I'm almost back to normalcy.

The only bad thing is that I have a backwards look on my instability. My anxiety/depression makes it so I don't always see it and my MS brain issues added to it means I don't 'understand' when it's happening. We don't always see the problem when we are in the middle of it. You know?

I see people taking mental health breaks from the hobby and today, I realize I should have done that in like October - April. My life fell apart and I fell apart with it. I should not have been supplementing my havoc of a RL with an virtual one. It's what I was doing. I couldn't see it at the time, but in hindsight, totes what I was doing.

I have NEVER been asked to leave a game before. I'm usually super up to get involved and tend to try to get others involved as much as possible, etc. I was asked to leave a game. Which was horrible for them (I mean obviously if I was asked to leave) and for a bit, really horrible for me. Like really really bad. However, it also made me take a break from MUing on a regular basis to fix me. I mean sometimes you need a stranger to give a wake up call. I was just seething in questions and bitter. It was less at a game (and the people on it) and more with where my RL was.

Depression and anxiety are a hell of a bitch to deal with. It's hard on the person suffering and we've touched on that, but it's also hard to the people around them while they are in their 'off' period. There is moments of reassurance needed, blowing things up that normally they wouldn't, etc. That list goes on and people have to deal with it if they are around you. We don't always talk about that. We try to say they should be understanding, but really we don't understand ourselves - so how can they? Also, if a person has only known you in your 'blue' period -- you might look like you belong on the batshit crazy board and they are probably wondering why others are defending you.

Anyways - This is just my rambling musing because that's sort of what this board is about. Mental health and all that. So I want to check in and say I'm good and back to normal (haha). The other thing s that I owe an apology (not on the apology thread - or the sorry not sorry board) to @apos and @Kanye-Qwest. I was stupid unstable on their game as I joined it at rock bottom IRL. So while my feels were hurt for the 'maybe this isn't the best game for you', it was what I needed to be like daaaayum son, I'm a little further gone than I thought. So anyways -- apologies to you two and any that I was a bit off towards there.

Okay, now work calls. Thank you for letting me ramble.

@Ghost

But is this love or just a game?

@Auspice

Have you used any of the Infinity Stone colors?

@surreality

As I'm pretty terrified petrified freaked the fuck out not really a fan of dolls, the idea that I have to dress them daily or the doll feels --- makes me uncomfortable. I suddenly do not want that doll under my bed either.

I do have a friend that is sort of a collector and I hear it all the time. I think it's creative, but it is ... strange.

@Thenomain

Until my money starts rolling in from the comedic gold.

@Thenomain said in RL Anger:

@Ganymede said in RL Anger:

I only have sex with extremely hot women

Welp, there go my chances.

Mine too!

@Thenomain said in Date Thenomain:

It'd be like hiring Tim Burton to direct, say, the movie adaptation of Mama Mia.

I'd totally watch that.

I think I'm choosing, though we could make a forum poll.

@Thenomain

No, but our matching strangers on the interwebz tats can be .

@Kanye-Qwest

What is the NC logo of Bitch Planet?

@Auspice

Share with me this nail polish site. Actually share them all with me.

Tattoo!!

I got my first one tonight and my sister got one too. This is super huge as we haven't been close for so many years. It was her first one and we got the same thing (but altered colors) and the same location.

Also, the pain wasn't as bad as I thought.

So @skew s in the running now too?

Princess Bride is just from my childhood, though I do try to get everyone to watch it.
I've seen all the Indiana Jones movies (we won't talk about the crystal skull one)
I saw Avatar on a date. I wasn't overly impressed. I mean it was pretty, but that's about it. Oh and it had 'kitties' but yeah.
Gonna be honest, I can't remember my thoughts on Inception -- which probably speaks for itself.

Sleep and water are HUGE factors. HUGE.

I drink water, I walk 4-6 miles daily, but I have issues sleeping and staying asleep. It messes with a lot of things and makes your body just over tired all the time

@Auspice

Still more yay you!

@Thenomain

You wouldn't want me. I'm all old and set in my ways and stuff and things.

Also, I have a requirement that anyone I date has seen (probably too many times) the Princess Bride.
How are there people out there that haven't?!

Whoa whoa... @Meg is still on the list and ... when did I get put on it?

@VulgarKitten

I hear coffee crisps are good. You send me that to the US and I'll send you um... well non-dairy treats?

Man I would totally be down for food/snack exchanges with non-US people. Now I'm sad.

So @VulgarKitten - When you win @Thenomain what will your dream date be?

@Meg when YOU win @Thenomain what will you do to impress him?

(The MSB version of the dating game)

@Auspice

Oh sweet mother....

I could write a ton that my mother discouraged when I was growing up, etc. From what clothing to wear to what toys to play with to what I should or shouldn't do.

In HS, I wanted to go into International Business. I took languages. I took core business classes beyond my accelerated classes. My mother told me it wasn't a realistic goal and told me maybe I should be a teacher or a nurse.

So.... yeah.

@Auspice

Yay you!